City of Freeport, Illinois Announces “Dole Pothole Detector”

The City of Freeport in honor of its Street Superintendent, Tom Dole, has announced that it will be selling to the general public pothole detectors which are recommended in the City of Freeport due to lack of street maintenance. The detectors will only cost $500.00, and are guaranteed to alert you to potholes before you hit them. If your car or tires are damaged as a result of a pothole and you are using the “Dole Pothole Detector,” the City will pay for the damage after a $500.00 deductible. I know from personal experience that I could have used the “Dole Pothole Detector” since my vehicle was recently damaged in excess of $500.00 as a result of potholes in Freeport. Any profits from the sale of the “Dole Pothole Detectors” will be used for Street Department bonuses. The one problem with using the “Dole Pothole Detector” in Freeport is that you will only be able to travel at five miles per hour since the pothole alarms are constant on most streets in the City. Oh well, that’s a small price to pay to live in a community with a Street Department that cares enough to sell us the “Dole Pothole Detector.”  

Unpaid Testimonial – Local Resident Holy Pots says: I use the “Dole Pothole Detector” and have never had any pothole damage – wonderful device and cheap at only $500.00.

Keep the “Dole Pothole Detector” in mind for birthday gifts and gifts for other special occasions. Hint – wouldn’t it be nice to give Mayor Gitz a “Dole Pothole Detector” as a going away present! Now that I think about it that may be too much. Let’s just give him a pothole instead autographed by his Street Superintendent who did so much for him over the last four years.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s